1. She's harvesting you for social media
Meeting someone for the first time and they already blast you over their Instagram stories ? They are just using you to appear popular and as someone who has lots of pretty friends which raises their social proof. Taking photos together but never sending them to you? yes, it's harvest time.
2. She likes exactly the same things, mirroring you
She finds out quickly what you like and what are you about and trying to be like you and emulate you. For example if you are obsessed with yoga she will be planning a yoga class with you (fake planning I might add) , you love theatre, she is sending you new plays for this season, you love certain kind of ice cream she will have the same. Actually it is very easy to notice that in a restaurant as she will have exactly the same as you. She hated Champagne till now but since you have it she will as well.
3. she copies you but in a competing way
Did you just go to a nice restaurant? She will go to exactly the same restaurant tomorrow (or pretend she did). You have a new handbag? She will get exactly the same model but bigger size, of course. If you have a certain type of job she will say her job is more important ( or more likely lie about it) . You go out together and she is not normally a a flamboyant dresser but since you are , she will buy an entire new wardrobe just to outdoes you. Has your boyfriend bought you a new piece of jewellery? Her non existing boyfriend who nobody has ever seen or met has just bought her a an even more expensive jewellery that she can't send you the photo of because it is being resized or cleaned or just doesn't even exist. You get the idea, everything is a competition.
4. She is shifty with no eye contact when you meet
Part of being friends is bonding over a conversation. Is she avoiding eye contact? That is a huge sign she is not genuine with you. She just simply can't stand your beautiful honest and happy personality and the shine that is beaming out of you to highlight her dark envious persona.
5. She never really listens to you.
She seems like she is but then she forgot the most important things of the conversation and you gather she didn't even understand anything of what you just said. She just pretends to listen it's that simple. Genuine friend remembers and cares about everything you say.
6. She is gossiping about other people
She is gossiping about you to others too. Get ready to have all your secrets broadcasted to all her friends and family. With some fake facts and judgement sprinkled in.
7. She is sending you compromising photos or videos of others
She took a sneaky photo of someone when they where not looking and on a really bad hair day or in a compromising situation? Smile for your photos because you are next! Yes really! This happens and it is a really vile thing to do, massive red flag.
8. She is lying about everything
Did her grandma just die and then you find out she died many years ago? Her dog is sick and needs treatment or maybe she wants you to offer help. Slowly you find out little lies and big whoppers as well. This is a massive red flag.
9. She has a secret agenda for you to use you for something
She might have a spare ticket for a show she wants you to buy off her, she needs someone to go out with, travel with , take her instagram photos. She invited you to her new place and then it turned out it's the moving day and she need you to help her. List goes on. She will always try to trick you into it rather than openly asking as she knows it's flat out taking advantage of you. It is not a healthy exchange like it would be with a real friend.
10. She is asking you for money directly or indirectly
Usually it comes in a covert form. There is some financial problems and she is hoping you to offer help, she is trying to make you feel sorry for her. Or directly by offering some kind of business idea that seems great but there is never any actual business plan to follow, just some loose ideas that anyone can put together in 5 minutes. She might forget the wallet when you go out and promise to give you the money back next time but then vanish.
11. She will say small direct or indirect criticisms
Of course everyone is nice in the beginning but if slowly you notice she criticise you by flat out telling you straight of maybe pointing out something in others that you are insecure about.
12. Microaggresions
Did she just push you or was that an accident? Did she shut the door in front of your face or she didn't actually see you, you can't prove it but yes your gut feeling is right , she did that on purpose as her aggression towards you is bubbling up to the surface but she has to stay fake nice for now. She probably wants something really bad to happen to you. By accident of course.
13. She pretends something she is not
She tells you she has a better job that she really has, she pretends she only eats in expensive places but she's broke, she pretends everything. Everything is just fake.
14. She is obsessed with rich people , being rich, expensive brands
The key word here is obsessed as everyone likes nice things and branded goods but she is obsessed with them on a daily basis and sending you content about it all the time, it's a big red flag.
15. She copies you. Everything about you
She literally copies everything you do professionally, looks wise, wears what you wear including very detailed things like everything your style or even contact lenses. She is so envious about you that she wants to be you. Creepy? Yes , very! Something from Single White Female movie. Run!!
16. You have an icky feeling after interactions
Your gut is trying to tell you something by making you feel icky in her presence , you can't put your finger on it, a general ambiance of manipulation, fakeness and lies that feels super icky. Don't ignore those feelings.
17. Killing your happiness
She will find something wrong with anything that makes you happy and will point it out for you. Your boyfriend dared to invite you for pizza and not a Michelin star restaurant , you should dump him ! You look great in pink and you love wearing it , she will criticise it and then wear it herself. It might be overt or covert , either way it will leave an icky feeling.
18. Undermining your achievements.
Have you studied and have a degree but she didn't and still doubting your knowledge about the very thing you studied? Yes, here we go. She will do anything to dim your shine.
19. Gaslighting you and dumping you
She might gaslight you and falsely accuse you of something you did or didn't do and then dump you hoping you would chase her but this is the time you you say - hasta la vista baby! Block and delete.
20. You feel relieved afterwards
After you figure it all out and you no longer see your fake friend (preferably block and delete her) you feel an immense sense of relief , like you just got rid of a burden or a leech that was draining you. You have newfound tremendous reservoirs of energy and joie de vivre that you have not been aware ever existed. You are feeling light and fluffy and sparkling , back to your normal self. Life is great again!
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